Ask Lola Archive!
(Only those who answered 'YES' in the third section are published here. For confidentiality purposes, we changed the real names and left out the email addresses.) These answers may be shorter than the actual email sent!
(Only those who answered 'YES' in the third section are published here. For confidentiality purposes, we changed the real names and left out the email addresses.) These answers may be shorter than the actual email sent!
Meddling
Ysa A.
Message
hi lola.. uhhmm pwede po ng advice? what if inlove ka po sa bestfriend mo pero di pwede maging kayo kasi kaw po mismo ang nagiging tulay nila para makipagbalikan sila ng gf niya. papatuloy mo parin po ba o hindi na? thanks po :)
Ask Lola says:
Once you meddle with someone's relationship, it's hard to stop being the middle person and be the main one. If you choose that path, then you might as well stick to it. Why be the bridge when you can be the other person at the other end of the bridge for someone else?
Ysa A.
Message
hi lola.. uhhmm pwede po ng advice? what if inlove ka po sa bestfriend mo pero di pwede maging kayo kasi kaw po mismo ang nagiging tulay nila para makipagbalikan sila ng gf niya. papatuloy mo parin po ba o hindi na? thanks po :)
Ask Lola says:
Once you meddle with someone's relationship, it's hard to stop being the middle person and be the main one. If you choose that path, then you might as well stick to it. Why be the bridge when you can be the other person at the other end of the bridge for someone else?
Should I wait or not?
Infinity :)
Message
Uhmm hi! :)
Well you see, kelangan ko po talaga ng advice. I have nobody to talk to about this and I hope that you could help me. And btw, medyo magiging mahaba po ito. :D Pero thanks in advance!
There's this guy that I love. Well actually nung 2nd year kami he confessed to me na he likes me but then I was too young para pumasok ako sa isang relationship. Well until now naman hindi pa rin ako ready. Kaya..naputol yung communication namin. And then nung 3rd year na kami, bumalik na naman siya. And this time, he asked me na talaga kung pwede nya ba kong ligawan, I swear to God gusto ko mag-yes pero I know na dapat magfocus muna ako sa studies ko kaya nag-no ako. Pero naging okay pa rin kami. Hanggang sa sinabi niya sakin na love pa rin niya yung ex niya. I was deeply hurt kaya pinutol ko yung communication namin. First heartbreak ko yun ever. But then nung 4th year na kami, mas naging close kami kaya I fell for him lalo. I was hoping na he would ask me again about the ligaw thing, but he never did. Before he left papuntang ibang country, he said that he loves me kaya pinanghawakan ko yung sinabi niyang yun. I told myself na I'm willing to wait. I loved him that much. It's been 4 months since he left and I can feel na he's falling for another girl na classmate niya. A part of me nagsasabi na magmove on na ko, pero at the same time ayoko din. Idk what's the right thing to do and I need you help.
Thanks for listening. :)
Ask Lola says:
It's really hard to wait for someone when there is no assurance that he will come back to you. But just for the sake of the argument that he is coming back for you or is willing to have a relationship with you: are you willing to put yourself in a situation wherein most of your relationship is spent online? If you say yes, I guess go for it. But the whole point is, you're missing half of your life when you can have someone by your side. You're not married to him, and you're young. Enjoy life! If you guys meet again one day and you think it will work, go for it. But for now, he seems to be enjoying himself with someone, and so should you.
Infinity :)
Message
Uhmm hi! :)
Well you see, kelangan ko po talaga ng advice. I have nobody to talk to about this and I hope that you could help me. And btw, medyo magiging mahaba po ito. :D Pero thanks in advance!
There's this guy that I love. Well actually nung 2nd year kami he confessed to me na he likes me but then I was too young para pumasok ako sa isang relationship. Well until now naman hindi pa rin ako ready. Kaya..naputol yung communication namin. And then nung 3rd year na kami, bumalik na naman siya. And this time, he asked me na talaga kung pwede nya ba kong ligawan, I swear to God gusto ko mag-yes pero I know na dapat magfocus muna ako sa studies ko kaya nag-no ako. Pero naging okay pa rin kami. Hanggang sa sinabi niya sakin na love pa rin niya yung ex niya. I was deeply hurt kaya pinutol ko yung communication namin. First heartbreak ko yun ever. But then nung 4th year na kami, mas naging close kami kaya I fell for him lalo. I was hoping na he would ask me again about the ligaw thing, but he never did. Before he left papuntang ibang country, he said that he loves me kaya pinanghawakan ko yung sinabi niyang yun. I told myself na I'm willing to wait. I loved him that much. It's been 4 months since he left and I can feel na he's falling for another girl na classmate niya. A part of me nagsasabi na magmove on na ko, pero at the same time ayoko din. Idk what's the right thing to do and I need you help.
Thanks for listening. :)
Ask Lola says:
It's really hard to wait for someone when there is no assurance that he will come back to you. But just for the sake of the argument that he is coming back for you or is willing to have a relationship with you: are you willing to put yourself in a situation wherein most of your relationship is spent online? If you say yes, I guess go for it. But the whole point is, you're missing half of your life when you can have someone by your side. You're not married to him, and you're young. Enjoy life! If you guys meet again one day and you think it will work, go for it. But for now, he seems to be enjoying himself with someone, and so should you.
He Keeps Appearing In My Dreams
Neyo Mie
Message
hi lola :)
I hve this problem po kasi.. I had a guy bestfriend before, we've been very close to the point that everybody thinks that we're together, we thought it's a bit crazy 'coz we're only 13 that time. pero ang totoo po i had a HUGE crush on him na dati pa. tapos d ko nman ineexpect na mas lalalim pa yung nararamdaman ko sakanya, hindi naman natin sinasadya yung mga nanagyayari diba lalo na pag sa love. minahal ko sya, sabi nga nila puppy love lang daw yun, high school pa kasi kami nun. natakot akong sabihin skanya yung nararamdaman ko kasi baka magalit sya kaya ang ginawa ko na lang eh umiwas sakanya, since nalaman kong may girfriend na pala sya nun. mnsan nya kong kinausap kung bakit daw ako umiiwas sinabi ko lang na mas gusto ko ng makipgfriends sa mga babae nd my gf na dn naman sya (na evetually eh one of my closest friend na nakakaalam ng feelings ko para sa bestfriend ko) kaya mas okay na yun. so nanatiling ganun yung story namin, everytime nakikita ko sya with his girl umiiyak lang ako (alam ko maarte, i just can't help but to feel hurt that time). then we graduated in highschool, umuwi kaming pilipinas lahat para magcollege kaya wala na kaming communication in years, wala na tlga akong alam sakanya, and i keep it that way para mkamove-on. 3 or four years have passed, nung mga panahong I thought i was over him na, bglang ung isa sa batchmates nmn tnawagan ako para sabihing may reunion daw sinabi kong pupunta ako kasi i missed all of them dn naman. nung dumating na yung day ng reunion, akala ko hindi sya mkakapunta kasi ipinag-tanong ko na sa iba naming kaibigan kung makakapunta ba sya, and ayun, sabi nila hindi kaya ganun na lang yung shock ko nung nakita ko syang palapit saamin. I was stunned, at hindi ko dn maexplain yung bilis ng tibok ng puso ko that time, basta ang bilis bilis na parang hndi ako makahabol sa bilis ng tibok nya. all this time i thought i was over him na, pero hindi pa pala. after that day, lagi na sya umaappear sa mga panaginip ko. i'm really confused right now. kasi isang taon na nakakalipas mula nung mangyari yung reunion na yun and may boyfriend na din ako now, pero mas napapadalas na yung pag-appear nya sa mga panaginip ko. tingin mo ba may meaning yung dreams ko about him? hanggang ngayon ba may feelings pa din ako sakanya?
Ask Lola says:
Dreams are very subjective. It can mean anything else. When you dream of a dog biting you, does not mean a dog is really going to bite you. I'm not saying cannot happen, it's just that, odds are, it won't. I say that feeling you had when you saw him was parallel to adrenaline rush in a sense. You're curious about him, how he's doing, since it has been awhile.. so you have that feeling of excitement. It's completely normal. Or maybe you still have a little bit of a crush on him. Old habits die hard.
I say spend more quality time with your boyfriend. You'd be glad you have him around.
Neyo Mie
Message
hi lola :)
I hve this problem po kasi.. I had a guy bestfriend before, we've been very close to the point that everybody thinks that we're together, we thought it's a bit crazy 'coz we're only 13 that time. pero ang totoo po i had a HUGE crush on him na dati pa. tapos d ko nman ineexpect na mas lalalim pa yung nararamdaman ko sakanya, hindi naman natin sinasadya yung mga nanagyayari diba lalo na pag sa love. minahal ko sya, sabi nga nila puppy love lang daw yun, high school pa kasi kami nun. natakot akong sabihin skanya yung nararamdaman ko kasi baka magalit sya kaya ang ginawa ko na lang eh umiwas sakanya, since nalaman kong may girfriend na pala sya nun. mnsan nya kong kinausap kung bakit daw ako umiiwas sinabi ko lang na mas gusto ko ng makipgfriends sa mga babae nd my gf na dn naman sya (na evetually eh one of my closest friend na nakakaalam ng feelings ko para sa bestfriend ko) kaya mas okay na yun. so nanatiling ganun yung story namin, everytime nakikita ko sya with his girl umiiyak lang ako (alam ko maarte, i just can't help but to feel hurt that time). then we graduated in highschool, umuwi kaming pilipinas lahat para magcollege kaya wala na kaming communication in years, wala na tlga akong alam sakanya, and i keep it that way para mkamove-on. 3 or four years have passed, nung mga panahong I thought i was over him na, bglang ung isa sa batchmates nmn tnawagan ako para sabihing may reunion daw sinabi kong pupunta ako kasi i missed all of them dn naman. nung dumating na yung day ng reunion, akala ko hindi sya mkakapunta kasi ipinag-tanong ko na sa iba naming kaibigan kung makakapunta ba sya, and ayun, sabi nila hindi kaya ganun na lang yung shock ko nung nakita ko syang palapit saamin. I was stunned, at hindi ko dn maexplain yung bilis ng tibok ng puso ko that time, basta ang bilis bilis na parang hndi ako makahabol sa bilis ng tibok nya. all this time i thought i was over him na, pero hindi pa pala. after that day, lagi na sya umaappear sa mga panaginip ko. i'm really confused right now. kasi isang taon na nakakalipas mula nung mangyari yung reunion na yun and may boyfriend na din ako now, pero mas napapadalas na yung pag-appear nya sa mga panaginip ko. tingin mo ba may meaning yung dreams ko about him? hanggang ngayon ba may feelings pa din ako sakanya?
Ask Lola says:
Dreams are very subjective. It can mean anything else. When you dream of a dog biting you, does not mean a dog is really going to bite you. I'm not saying cannot happen, it's just that, odds are, it won't. I say that feeling you had when you saw him was parallel to adrenaline rush in a sense. You're curious about him, how he's doing, since it has been awhile.. so you have that feeling of excitement. It's completely normal. Or maybe you still have a little bit of a crush on him. Old habits die hard.
I say spend more quality time with your boyfriend. You'd be glad you have him around.
Study Habit Tips
ELLE :)
Message
Hi!! It's me again.. haha. Thank you nga pala sa previous advice mo sa akin.. It gave me an idea.. anyways.. problem ko naman ngaun.. (parang ang dami kong problems.. haha. xD).. can you give me some tips regarding study habits? kasi everytime na hahawak ako ng libro para magreview.. palaging may iba akong naiisip na gawin at in the end.. hindi na ko nakakapagreview. I tried several things na para ma-"fire up" ako sa pag-aaral pero, no use.. ayun.. thanks ulit LOLA!
Ask Lola says:
Studying habits is different for every individual. What I find useful is to create an exact schedule of when you're doing what. If you follow through your schedule, reward yourself. If you don't, punish yourself (e.g. can't go out with friends, can't talk to my crush etc.) It also helps to study in places where there's less temptation to do something else. Your bed might be the most comfortable place, but might not be the best place to study at. Find a spot where all you can do is be a nerd and be an awesome student. If you can turn your phone off, it also helps rather than you anticipating for a text message or a call all the time.
Also, if you can finish whatever it is that bugs you before you need to study, do so. That case, you don't think about it agian. Good luck!
ELLE :)
Message
Hi!! It's me again.. haha. Thank you nga pala sa previous advice mo sa akin.. It gave me an idea.. anyways.. problem ko naman ngaun.. (parang ang dami kong problems.. haha. xD).. can you give me some tips regarding study habits? kasi everytime na hahawak ako ng libro para magreview.. palaging may iba akong naiisip na gawin at in the end.. hindi na ko nakakapagreview. I tried several things na para ma-"fire up" ako sa pag-aaral pero, no use.. ayun.. thanks ulit LOLA!
Ask Lola says:
Studying habits is different for every individual. What I find useful is to create an exact schedule of when you're doing what. If you follow through your schedule, reward yourself. If you don't, punish yourself (e.g. can't go out with friends, can't talk to my crush etc.) It also helps to study in places where there's less temptation to do something else. Your bed might be the most comfortable place, but might not be the best place to study at. Find a spot where all you can do is be a nerd and be an awesome student. If you can turn your phone off, it also helps rather than you anticipating for a text message or a call all the time.
Also, if you can finish whatever it is that bugs you before you need to study, do so. That case, you don't think about it agian. Good luck!
No Formal Introduction
Alina P.
Message
hello. im turning 19 and i have a boyfriend who's turning 20 this year too. we have been together for more than half a year now pero di ko pa rin namimeet yung parents niya. i can understand if i can't meet his father because he's in the big city. malayo talaga dito sa amin. however, his mom is just in the province, a 2-hour drive away or something. i've never really been to their house. i mean, yung totoong bahay nila. nakikitira lang siya sa bahay ng lola niya with his brither for the sake of his studies.
siya naman, nameet niya na yung parents ko. nanliligaw pa lang siya sa akin, pinakilala ko na siya sa parents ko. siya ang unang legal kong bf (yung iba, hindi ko naipakilala dahil binabawalan ako. i just took the risk with him coz i can see he's worth it.) so ayun, ngayong kami na, madalas siyang andito sa bahay at mabait sa kanya ang parents ko. botong boto pa nga sa kanya.
i'm just wondering kung bakit kahit na 6 months na kami, ni hindi niya pa ako pinapakilala sa parents niya, or kahit sa lola niya na may-ari ng boarding house. yung brother pa lang niya ang nakilala ko but i only met him once. is it just me, or parang unfair sa part na hindi ko kilala family niya, at di pa ako nakakapunta sa bahay nila? looking forward to your advice lola. thanks!
Ask Lola says:
Some guys just take longer to be ready. Give him some time. If you think enough time already elapsed and he still has not introduced you, you can always ask him and see what he says. This removes tension and worries.
Alina P.
Message
hello. im turning 19 and i have a boyfriend who's turning 20 this year too. we have been together for more than half a year now pero di ko pa rin namimeet yung parents niya. i can understand if i can't meet his father because he's in the big city. malayo talaga dito sa amin. however, his mom is just in the province, a 2-hour drive away or something. i've never really been to their house. i mean, yung totoong bahay nila. nakikitira lang siya sa bahay ng lola niya with his brither for the sake of his studies.
siya naman, nameet niya na yung parents ko. nanliligaw pa lang siya sa akin, pinakilala ko na siya sa parents ko. siya ang unang legal kong bf (yung iba, hindi ko naipakilala dahil binabawalan ako. i just took the risk with him coz i can see he's worth it.) so ayun, ngayong kami na, madalas siyang andito sa bahay at mabait sa kanya ang parents ko. botong boto pa nga sa kanya.
i'm just wondering kung bakit kahit na 6 months na kami, ni hindi niya pa ako pinapakilala sa parents niya, or kahit sa lola niya na may-ari ng boarding house. yung brother pa lang niya ang nakilala ko but i only met him once. is it just me, or parang unfair sa part na hindi ko kilala family niya, at di pa ako nakakapunta sa bahay nila? looking forward to your advice lola. thanks!
Ask Lola says:
Some guys just take longer to be ready. Give him some time. If you think enough time already elapsed and he still has not introduced you, you can always ask him and see what he says. This removes tension and worries.
Overprotective Bestfriend
Abby T.
Message
hi lola.. :)
i just want to ask an advice to you.
first i have a bestfriend who like this guy and surely she really loves this guy. the worst thing is mag BESTFRIEND din sila..
may time na this yung guy nag ask ng favor sa bestfriend ko na tulungan sila magkabalikan nung gf niya pumayag ang bestfriend ko (MARTIR eh)pero naghanap siya kung paano niya makakausap yung ex nung guy nakagawa naman siya ng paraan. naramdaman nung bestfriend ko kung gaano kamahal nung bestfriend niya yung ex nito sobrang nasaktan yung bestfriend ko.
the worst thing ea alam na yta nung bestfriend niya mahal na mahal siya nung bestfriend ko eh pilit parin niya pinapakita sa bestfriend ko kung ano yung nararamdaman niya dun sa ex niya sa pagkakalaman ko din eh PLAYBOY yung guy.
sobra sila close nung guy kasi pareho sila ng school at alam ko din na lagi sila makasama madalas kasi ikwento sakin ng bestfriend ko. madalas pinoprotektahan nung guy yung bestfriend ko kaya ala nakakalapit sa kanya ibang lalaki lalo na pag ndi kilala nung bestfriend niya.
yung tropa nung guy may gusto sa bestfriend ko gusto niya mangligaw pero ayaw ng guy. sinabi niya sa bestfriend ko na wag daw un. di ko maintindihan yung guy ea at ayoko nahihirapan yung bestfriend ko dahil sobra niya mahal yung bestfriend niya.
hanggang dito na lang lola.
thanks :)
Ask Lola says:
If he has a girlfriend, he shouldn't be playing with someone else's feelings. I say, your bestfriend should open doors for others. If the guy she likes cannot commit to her because he's already committed to someone else, he has no right to stop any guy who is willing to care for your friend regardless of them being bestfriends or not.
Abby T.
Message
hi lola.. :)
i just want to ask an advice to you.
first i have a bestfriend who like this guy and surely she really loves this guy. the worst thing is mag BESTFRIEND din sila..
may time na this yung guy nag ask ng favor sa bestfriend ko na tulungan sila magkabalikan nung gf niya pumayag ang bestfriend ko (MARTIR eh)pero naghanap siya kung paano niya makakausap yung ex nung guy nakagawa naman siya ng paraan. naramdaman nung bestfriend ko kung gaano kamahal nung bestfriend niya yung ex nito sobrang nasaktan yung bestfriend ko.
the worst thing ea alam na yta nung bestfriend niya mahal na mahal siya nung bestfriend ko eh pilit parin niya pinapakita sa bestfriend ko kung ano yung nararamdaman niya dun sa ex niya sa pagkakalaman ko din eh PLAYBOY yung guy.
sobra sila close nung guy kasi pareho sila ng school at alam ko din na lagi sila makasama madalas kasi ikwento sakin ng bestfriend ko. madalas pinoprotektahan nung guy yung bestfriend ko kaya ala nakakalapit sa kanya ibang lalaki lalo na pag ndi kilala nung bestfriend niya.
yung tropa nung guy may gusto sa bestfriend ko gusto niya mangligaw pero ayaw ng guy. sinabi niya sa bestfriend ko na wag daw un. di ko maintindihan yung guy ea at ayoko nahihirapan yung bestfriend ko dahil sobra niya mahal yung bestfriend niya.
hanggang dito na lang lola.
thanks :)
Ask Lola says:
If he has a girlfriend, he shouldn't be playing with someone else's feelings. I say, your bestfriend should open doors for others. If the guy she likes cannot commit to her because he's already committed to someone else, he has no right to stop any guy who is willing to care for your friend regardless of them being bestfriends or not.
Second Chance or not?
Bethany B.
Message
pano po qng masaya nman ung relation nio with your bf and all of a sudden umamin sya sau na nakikipag flirt sya sa ibang girl na lumalandi sa kanya .nakokonsensya daw kc cia kaya nia sakin un cnabi and his asking me 2 give him a second chance ...nalilito po aq qng anong magiging desisyon q
Ask Lola says:
Well, you have to give him credit for actually telling you he did flirt with someone. If he actually came clean and became honest with you, I think he deserves a second chance. Now, if this is a reoccuring behavior, that's a different story.
Bethany B.
Message
pano po qng masaya nman ung relation nio with your bf and all of a sudden umamin sya sau na nakikipag flirt sya sa ibang girl na lumalandi sa kanya .nakokonsensya daw kc cia kaya nia sakin un cnabi and his asking me 2 give him a second chance ...nalilito po aq qng anong magiging desisyon q
Ask Lola says:
Well, you have to give him credit for actually telling you he did flirt with someone. If he actually came clean and became honest with you, I think he deserves a second chance. Now, if this is a reoccuring behavior, that's a different story.
Drunk Game
Lee
Message
HI!
I like someone. He's five years older than me.. and he's my blockmate. We don't talk that much.. no, actually, di pa talaga kami nagkakausap.. except Last Friday night. nagkainuman kasi sa place nila. tapos pumunta kami tapos dun.. dun yung first time na magusap kami. we did a drinking game.. Eh first time ko pa uminom nun.. tapos dun nya ako kinausap.. Parang ginagawa nya yung lahat mapainom lang ako. TAPOS TAPOS TAPOS syempre, napainom po ako nun. na-tipsy pa nga ako. nakakatawa kasi ang ingay ingay ko nun tapos tawa ako ng tawa.. at dahil nga tipsy na ako nun, hinatid nya ako sa may sakayan ng trike. tas nung pasakay na ako ng trike he hugged me. tapos mejo hawak sa kamay.
AT DUN NABUO YUNG FEELINGS KO WAAAH ATE TULONG! ayoko ng ganitong feeling. pano po ba mawala yung ganitong feeling?? lgi ko kasi yun naaalala. hahaha! sorry ah, mababaw :)))))))))))
Ask Lola says:
I was debating whether to publish this or not due to the "drinking" component. But it's purely.. having fun right and I hope no one got hurt, so I'll give it a chance.
You're just a little high about the situation. Adrenaline rush type of thing. If you really have a crush on this guy, it might continue. If it's just a spur of the moment type of thing, you might forget about him. But if it all else fails, hang out with your friends some more. Meet other people. Keep yourself busy. That always works when you're trying to keep your mind off of something :)
Message
HI!
I like someone. He's five years older than me.. and he's my blockmate. We don't talk that much.. no, actually, di pa talaga kami nagkakausap.. except Last Friday night. nagkainuman kasi sa place nila. tapos pumunta kami tapos dun.. dun yung first time na magusap kami. we did a drinking game.. Eh first time ko pa uminom nun.. tapos dun nya ako kinausap.. Parang ginagawa nya yung lahat mapainom lang ako. TAPOS TAPOS TAPOS syempre, napainom po ako nun. na-tipsy pa nga ako. nakakatawa kasi ang ingay ingay ko nun tapos tawa ako ng tawa.. at dahil nga tipsy na ako nun, hinatid nya ako sa may sakayan ng trike. tas nung pasakay na ako ng trike he hugged me. tapos mejo hawak sa kamay.
AT DUN NABUO YUNG FEELINGS KO WAAAH ATE TULONG! ayoko ng ganitong feeling. pano po ba mawala yung ganitong feeling?? lgi ko kasi yun naaalala. hahaha! sorry ah, mababaw :)))))))))))
Ask Lola says:
I was debating whether to publish this or not due to the "drinking" component. But it's purely.. having fun right and I hope no one got hurt, so I'll give it a chance.
You're just a little high about the situation. Adrenaline rush type of thing. If you really have a crush on this guy, it might continue. If it's just a spur of the moment type of thing, you might forget about him. But if it all else fails, hang out with your friends some more. Meet other people. Keep yourself busy. That always works when you're trying to keep your mind off of something :)
Building Boy
Shy Girl
Message
Dear Lola,
Hi! Uh, there's this one guy who lives in the same building as I do. I'm 20 and I think we're of the same age. I can count on my fingers of one hand the number of times that we've bumped into each other. But one time while I was walking back home, I saw him on the way and I know he saw me too cause I caught his eyes. I just kept walking. He's really tall so his one step is like two steps for me. I think he was 10 steps ahead of me that time. What surprised me is that, he turned his head to look at me one more time. What does that mean?
He's cute and looks so mysterious to me. I wanted to ask the security guard of this building for that guy's name cause he knows everyone here. But my mom said I shouldn't cause it's so unladylike and it might freak him out if ever he finds out. She said, it would be better if a guy's the one who'll approach a girl first. So I ended up not asking.. I REALLY do wanna get to know him, but I don't know how.. especially now that I haven't seen him around that much lately. Sorry for the long story :)
A little help? Thanks in advance!
Ask Lola says:
I think I may have to agree with your mom about asking the security guard: I think that's a little stalkerish. i would just freak out if I find out someone's been investigating on me (not that, that's what you're doing.)
If you really want to get to know him, in the normal-nonstalkerish way, then the next time you bump into him.... try to joke around and strike a conversation. If you talk to him and he's polite enough to respond to you.. there you go. You can be friends and maybe more from there!
Good luck!
Message
Dear Lola,
Hi! Uh, there's this one guy who lives in the same building as I do. I'm 20 and I think we're of the same age. I can count on my fingers of one hand the number of times that we've bumped into each other. But one time while I was walking back home, I saw him on the way and I know he saw me too cause I caught his eyes. I just kept walking. He's really tall so his one step is like two steps for me. I think he was 10 steps ahead of me that time. What surprised me is that, he turned his head to look at me one more time. What does that mean?
He's cute and looks so mysterious to me. I wanted to ask the security guard of this building for that guy's name cause he knows everyone here. But my mom said I shouldn't cause it's so unladylike and it might freak him out if ever he finds out. She said, it would be better if a guy's the one who'll approach a girl first. So I ended up not asking.. I REALLY do wanna get to know him, but I don't know how.. especially now that I haven't seen him around that much lately. Sorry for the long story :)
A little help? Thanks in advance!
Ask Lola says:
I think I may have to agree with your mom about asking the security guard: I think that's a little stalkerish. i would just freak out if I find out someone's been investigating on me (not that, that's what you're doing.)
If you really want to get to know him, in the normal-nonstalkerish way, then the next time you bump into him.... try to joke around and strike a conversation. If you talk to him and he's polite enough to respond to you.. there you go. You can be friends and maybe more from there!
Good luck!
Crush ng Bayan
R.D.
Message
hi miss jessica!. it's great that you have this. whew!
okay. my problem. I have a huge, HUGE crush on your boyfriend. nah. kidding. hehe. but yeah, he is cute. hope you will be together, forever. :)
and for the dilemma I have right now. :( okay. there is this guy,my batch mate but not my classmate. we are also in the same course and we knew each other back when we were first years, (we are fourth year college right now by the way), but we were not that very close. But when we were in third year, we began texting and I was amazed to find out that the only one he replies to is me. His close friends and classmates were complaining that he does not reply to their messages, however when they found out that we were having random exchange of text messages, they started questioning. And me, innocent at that time, said that there is nothing. I don't have feelings for him. just friends. I was firm with that back then. But, our closeness was just noticeable and his friends again said that he does things to me which he usually don't do to other girls. I also feel comfortable when I'm with him. I thought for a while that is was just because I treat him as my brother since I don't have one and he also treats me as his sister cause he is an only child. But our friends started teasing us. During our prom, girls were excited to have a picture of him, but lucky me cause he was the one who approached me to have picture taken together. I was the only one also whom he asked to dance, though the song was 2012. no sweet songs on our prom. bad. so this was what happened on the prom:
after some rounds of dances with our friends, we decided to sit down. I really did not have plans to dance again. So, I just watched him and his friend to the dance floor again. And the, he came back. I thought, he was going to let me hold his camera. but he placed the camera in the table and held my hand. I also thought, he would also ask the other 10 girls to dance, but hey, he continued walking without looking back while he is still holding my hand. ???. O_O
So, that was the start of my confusion. But then he was courting another girl after that. I also knew of those things. But his sweetness is just still the same. Just then, he stopped courting that girl cause all along, it was just pity he felt for her, not love.
I could have been okay if I am the only one who has "feelings" for him, but his actions are confusing me. his friends are also telling me that there is really something with that he is acting towards me. One time he said, "you know what, it could have been better if your class schedule was the same as mine. at least, we could be together." and I was like speechless. =_=
What shocked me was even the lower years started teasing us, that they got kilig when we start teasing and quarreling with each other. Until now, there is that closeness. And a lot teases us already. I really don't know what's with us. just want to share.
p.s: he is the crush ng bayan. masyadong gwapo kung kami na magkasama.
:(
Ask Lola says:
WOW THAT WAS A LONG-A** Message!
I refuse to answer this because your opening might make my boss unhappy (Ken is Jessica's and Jessica's only! KIDDING!)
skladksladkaldksal OH COME ON! I don't think I have to spell it out for you..... HE LIKES YOU!
He said so himself, he courted the other girl out of pity (which was messed up in a sense but oh well.. life happens.) But seriously, his friends, your friends, everyone is telling you guys.. so why not listen? You both have the chemistry together, so don't make the problem any more complicated!
If he's "crush ng bayan," then even better. If he ends up as your boyfriend, embrace it! He's with you, not with them. That's the problem of the girls with the popular guys: they already have the guy and they're still insecure.
The next time he says something a little forward... try to give him a hint to urge him to say something. You never know, he might say it out loud and you guys are on the right direction! :) Grab the opportunity while you have it. Of if you're bold enough, you can even ask him yourself: why are you so sweet to me?
You'll get the answer that will remove all this confusion. Unless he's one of those "Dumbledore" word player, then it's gets puzzling.
Message
hi miss jessica!. it's great that you have this. whew!
okay. my problem. I have a huge, HUGE crush on your boyfriend. nah. kidding. hehe. but yeah, he is cute. hope you will be together, forever. :)
and for the dilemma I have right now. :( okay. there is this guy,my batch mate but not my classmate. we are also in the same course and we knew each other back when we were first years, (we are fourth year college right now by the way), but we were not that very close. But when we were in third year, we began texting and I was amazed to find out that the only one he replies to is me. His close friends and classmates were complaining that he does not reply to their messages, however when they found out that we were having random exchange of text messages, they started questioning. And me, innocent at that time, said that there is nothing. I don't have feelings for him. just friends. I was firm with that back then. But, our closeness was just noticeable and his friends again said that he does things to me which he usually don't do to other girls. I also feel comfortable when I'm with him. I thought for a while that is was just because I treat him as my brother since I don't have one and he also treats me as his sister cause he is an only child. But our friends started teasing us. During our prom, girls were excited to have a picture of him, but lucky me cause he was the one who approached me to have picture taken together. I was the only one also whom he asked to dance, though the song was 2012. no sweet songs on our prom. bad. so this was what happened on the prom:
after some rounds of dances with our friends, we decided to sit down. I really did not have plans to dance again. So, I just watched him and his friend to the dance floor again. And the, he came back. I thought, he was going to let me hold his camera. but he placed the camera in the table and held my hand. I also thought, he would also ask the other 10 girls to dance, but hey, he continued walking without looking back while he is still holding my hand. ???. O_O
So, that was the start of my confusion. But then he was courting another girl after that. I also knew of those things. But his sweetness is just still the same. Just then, he stopped courting that girl cause all along, it was just pity he felt for her, not love.
I could have been okay if I am the only one who has "feelings" for him, but his actions are confusing me. his friends are also telling me that there is really something with that he is acting towards me. One time he said, "you know what, it could have been better if your class schedule was the same as mine. at least, we could be together." and I was like speechless. =_=
What shocked me was even the lower years started teasing us, that they got kilig when we start teasing and quarreling with each other. Until now, there is that closeness. And a lot teases us already. I really don't know what's with us. just want to share.
p.s: he is the crush ng bayan. masyadong gwapo kung kami na magkasama.
:(
Ask Lola says:
WOW THAT WAS A LONG-A** Message!
I refuse to answer this because your opening might make my boss unhappy (Ken is Jessica's and Jessica's only! KIDDING!)
skladksladkaldksal OH COME ON! I don't think I have to spell it out for you..... HE LIKES YOU!
He said so himself, he courted the other girl out of pity (which was messed up in a sense but oh well.. life happens.) But seriously, his friends, your friends, everyone is telling you guys.. so why not listen? You both have the chemistry together, so don't make the problem any more complicated!
If he's "crush ng bayan," then even better. If he ends up as your boyfriend, embrace it! He's with you, not with them. That's the problem of the girls with the popular guys: they already have the guy and they're still insecure.
The next time he says something a little forward... try to give him a hint to urge him to say something. You never know, he might say it out loud and you guys are on the right direction! :) Grab the opportunity while you have it. Of if you're bold enough, you can even ask him yourself: why are you so sweet to me?
You'll get the answer that will remove all this confusion. Unless he's one of those "Dumbledore" word player, then it's gets puzzling.